Kerala Yatra: February 11, 2013 - February 16, 2013

Started from tuty at 10:30 by bus (SETC) and reached tirunelveli at 11:30. Isravel picked us at Bus Stand. Went to Janakiram for lunch started on the Yatra at 12:30

I have started on a critical and analytical journey. Was thinking how to pray, what to pray, what to ask. What should be my sankalpam? My first instinct was to go to these temples and "blackmail" saying that i will not come back to see them unless they grant me the boons and blessings i seek. Fancy my chances of convincing the gods that they will miss 'me'. So narcissistic and self pompous thought. So I decided that I will not blackmail the gods in front of the sannithanams.

The next instinct was to "bribe" them saying that if they grant me my boons and blessings I will return and instead of giving them Rs.10 will give each Rs.500. Again fancy my chances that how much I have to give to impress and ask for quid pro quo.

I soon realised that I can not "bargain", i cannot blackmail, all I can do is surrender and go to the sannithanams and lay a petition seeking a list of boons and blessings and will wait for them to act on them at their will. But that was being naive -- where the list is not going to be any different from my earlier lists or something that the 'omniscient' himself/herself did not know.

Then, should I "beg"? Show that I am desperate. After all, only the crying child gets fed. Yes, he and she are full of love. But how am I to get their attention. Will my begging be answered by alms of Boons?

So what am I to do at the sannithanams, what form of prayer should I follow. How am I to go about this journey.

Will this be a journey of self discovery?

Will this be a journey of self realisation?

Will this journey show the path of self actualisation?

What attracted me to this journey? Why this journey? Maybe I thought seeing all gods could bring about a whole change in me. Since we will be seeing Ganapathy, Iyyappan, Shivan, Parvathi/ Sakthi, krishnan, Vishnu, dhanvanthri, nagayakshi, katyayini, Kali, murugar, bharathan, ramar, Adishankarar... Like a galaxy of gods - If all their grace will not bring good things in my life... Who will? Or what will?

Well I have 6 days to introspect.

Introspection! Will it bring sanity? Or Will it drive me to insanity? One one hand I know there is no progress without introspection but at the same time, introspection without any new inputs is a waste of time because it will lead me to the same decisions that I have made. This where I miss my Guru. There was a daily progress when I was with him. Without him there is stagnation of thoughts and break-down in my spiritual journey.

Well, we reached Kottarakkara at 4:30pm and had darshan at 5:00 sharp. Stood dumb founded in front of Ganapathy. Just allowed the energy to envelop into me. Felt nice heaviness in Ajna. Slowly asked for removal of all hurdles in personal/financial/physical well being and reach my potential. Again slowly realising that I have to first fix what is my potential. What is my potential? To lead the world? Country? State? City? I don't think it is in my potential to lead any part of any community! Thinking a bit... I come to realise this exercise is futile as I have started to confuse potential with destiny! What is destiny but one that can be seen only after the journey. Destiny! That makes me rephrase my earlier statement. I don't think it is in my destiny to lead any part of any community. Makes more sense. Because it is still my potential - provided I get the opportunity. Hmmmm.. Probably doesn't make sense... Just some confused ramblings..... After all the journey (Yatra) has just begun. Will surely be writing more clearly towards the end I hope.

Onwards we go towards Pandalam. Birthplace of Shri. ayyappan. Well before I could do some introspection .. We have visited Pandalam, Chengannur, Thiruvalla, Chakkulathukaavu. Remained plain in thoughts... Taking in the visual forms of the deities, taking in their vibrations.

Continuing the thoughts... What are the blessings / boons I seek? Do I deserve them? I have no doubt that I would have been a better person in this life if I had got what I deserved at the appropriate stages in life. So I am right in demanding now what I deserve. Coming back to the things I deserve... Why haven't I got them yet? Is it by design? Is it to experience this a part of my greater education that spans across lives?

Staying over night at Kottayam. On with my night ramblings...

Taking one of the major pain points in my life being that of my marriage...what do I want? I want A true companion... An understanding Partner... A passionate lover... an Avid learner and a patient teacher, whose love I have won and surrendered my love to her... Whose respect I am able to earn and maintain, who motivates me, who is optimistic...who understands my path of Shaktha...and plays her role... And we become spiritual partners... Share divine love...suddenly my own thoughts make me laugh.. Going more and more towards idealism... After all when I am about to get married only at 40 I strongly feel that I should increase standards instead of lowering as common sense dictates.even if I have an aorta of a chance of living the few years in love. Sharing loving times for as long as possible. Ok.ok. I am painting an impossible rosy picture... Maybe... I will spend my married life being successfully henpecked and may be filled with bickering till end... May be... But as I pray... Let me pray for the best... My philosophy has been... Expect the best while preparing for the worst...

An hectic morning visiting Thirunakkara(Kottayam), Etrumaanoor, Kaduthurithi, Vaikom, Chottanikkara, Thiruppunnithura and drove down to Guruvayoor.

Continuing my thoughts at Guruvayoor.

Off late I have been very distracted.... Is it possible that I was avoiding introspection... Avoiding critically thinking about myself, avoid assessing myself, avoiding evaluating myself? One could say that... But, I have been doing it on and off..... Many a day I have cried to sleep in loneliness - fearing that is how I might spend my last days... Never knowing companionship...so I have distracted myself from going to those realms of assessing where I was and kept entertaining myself.

Nice early morning visits to Kodungallur, Irinjalakuda, Vadakkunatha, Parmekavu, Thiruvembady and drove down to Kalady for Siddharth's Upanayanam.

While in silent thoughts after the poonal, the most pressing idea in my mind is 'causality'. Rather, the simple questions of "how do we influence the future"? Even to the point that, "are we influencing the outcome of anything at all"? What can we do to influence the order of things that unfold. Are we like sparrows who think highly of its strength that it thinks it caused the fruit to fall, while it was a fact that the fruit was just ripe to begin its journey. Are we?

Coming back to priorities in life and the order of boons I seek, one of the questions that pops to mind is... What am I seeking?

All I can say for sure, is that, I feel a huge void in my life. I am not too sure as to what is that void and whether I. Love, ii. Money, iii. Career, iv. Power, v. Recognition, vi. Spiritual realisation, vii. One of the above, viii. Some of the above, ix. All of the above, will actually fill it. As of now, I feel it is love that I seek the most.. May be I am wrong. May be I am right. If I seek for something that will not actually fill that void, then boy am I in real trouble. Wherein I will end up in a much bigger void than I originally have now... Hmmmmm... But I do think that logically, if I am able to get the right spiritual partner then the void should be filled to a great extent and help me focus in achieving what I ought to as far as the rest of the list is concerned. Coming to think of it, love is the only thing in the list above that is not under my sole control. Rest all are surely under my control. So am I feeling helpless because I do not feel in control of my love life? The more I think about this, the more sure I am. So every thing in my life depends on me finding the right partner.

What if I don't get this partner? Or even worse, get a partner who does more damage than help? Oh! These are the very questions that torment me day and night. I am generally optimistic... But why am I becoming pessimistic in this particular case? Experience? So many disappointments over the past 14 years? A fore boding of the realisation that the purpose in my life is to suffer and experience? In which case, I should be able to cope with it better. Am I coping with this in the best possible way? I am sure I am coping reasonably well. Am I? I am.

So what should I do - now that this journey is over? 

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SECRETS OF LOVE

Secrets of Love

The first secret: the power of love. Love begins with our thoughts. We become what we think. Loving thoughts create loving experiences and loving relationships. Affirmations can change our beliefs and thoughts about ourselves and others. If we want to love someone, we need to consider their needs and desires. Thinking about your ideal partner will help recognize him or her when you meet.

The second secret: the power of respect. You cannot love anyone or anything unless you first respect them. The first person you need to respect is yourself. To begin to gain self-respect ask yourself, "What do I respect about myself? " To gain respect for others, even those you may dislike, ask yourself, "What do I respect about them?"

The third secret: the power of giving. If you want to receive love, all you have to do is give it! The more love you give, the more you will receive. To love is to give of yourself, freely and unconditionally. Practice random acts of kindness. The secret formula of a happy, lifelong relationship is to always focus on what you can give instead of you can take.

The fourth secret: the power of friendship. To find true love you must first find a true friend. To love someone completely you must love them for who they are not what they look like. Friendship is the soil through which love's seeds grow. If you want to bring love into a relationship, you must first bring friendship.

The fifth secret: the power of touch. Touch is one of the most powerful expressions of love, breaking down barriers and bonding relationships. Touch changes our physical and emotional states and makes us more receptive to love.

The sixth secret: the power of letting go. If you love something, let it be free. Even in a loving relationship, people need their space. If we want to learn to love, we must first learn to forgive and let go of past hurts and grievances. Love means letting go of our fears, prejudices, egos and conditions.

The seventh secret: the power of communication. To love someone is to communicate with them. Let the people you love know; that you love and appreciate them. Never be afraid to say, "I love you." Never let an opportunity pass to praise and acknowledge someone. Always leave someone you love with a loving word ... it could be the last time you see them.

The eighth secret: the power of commitment. If you want to have love in abundance, you must be committed to it. Commitment is the true test of love. If you want to have loving relationships, you must be committed to loving relationships. When you are committed to someone or something, quitting is never an option. Commitment distinguishes a fragile relationship from a strong, loving one.

The ninth secret: the power of passion. Passion ignites love and keeps it alive. Lasting passion does not come through physical attraction alone. It comes from deep commitment, enthusiasm, interest and excitement. The essence of love and happiness are the same, all we need to do is to live each day with passion.

The tenth secret: the power of trust. You cannot love someone completely unless you trust them completely. Act as if your relationship with the person you love will never end. Trust is essential in all loving relationships. Trust yourself, trust others and trust the world. It is the foundation for LOVE.

SAPTAPADI

SAPTAPADI

The meaning of the sanskrit verses recited by the bridegroom as a promise to the bride during the hindu marriages.

1. My beloved, our love has become firm by your walking one with me. Together we will share the responsibilities of the home, food and finances. May God bless us with noble children to share. May they live long.

1. This is my commitment to you, my lord. Together we will share the responsibility of the home, food and finances. I promise that I shall discharge all of my share of the responsibilities for the welfare of the family and the children.

2. O my beloved goddess, now you have walked with me, the second step. May God bless you. I will love you and you alone as my wife. I will fill your heart with strength and courage: this is my commitment and my pledge to you. May God protect the household and children.

2. My lord, at all times, I shall fill your heart with courage and strength. In your happiness I shall rejoice. May God bless you and our household.

3. O my beloved goddess, now since you have walked three steps with me, our wealth and prosperity will grow. May God bless us. May we educate our children and may they live long.

3. My lord, I love you with single-minded devotion as my husband. I will treat all other men as my brothers. My devotions to you is pure and you are my joy. This is my commitment and pledge to you.

4. O my beloved goddess, it is a great blessing that you have now walked four steps with me. May God bless you. You have brought auspiciousness and sacredness in my life.

4. O my lord, in all acts of righteousness (Dharma), in material prosperity (Artha), in every form of enjoyment, and in those divine acts such as fire sacrifice, worship and charity, I promise you that I shall participate and I will always be with you.

5. O my beloved goddess, now you have walked five steps with me. May Mahalakshmi make us prosperous. May God bless us.

5. O my lord, I will share both in your joys and sorrows. Your love will make me very happy.

6. O my beloved goddess, by walking six steps with me, you have filled my heart with happiness. May I fill your heart with great joy and peace, time and time again. God bless you.

6. My lord, may God bless you. May I fill your heart with great joy and peace. I promise that I will always be with you.

7. O my beloved goddess, as you have walked the seven steps with me, our love and friendship have become inseparable and firm. We have experienced spiritual union in God. Now you have become completely mine. I offer my total self to you. May our marriage last forever.

7. My lord, by the law of God, and the holy scriptures, I have become your spouse. Whatever promises I gave you I have spoken them with a pure heart. All the angels are witnesses to this fact. I shall never deceive you, nor will I let you down. Forever I shall love you.

Guru

When one Guru was dying, one of his deciple asked him "Guruji, who was your master?"He said, "I had thousands of masters. If I just relate their names it will take months, years and it is too late. But three masters I will certainly tell you about.

One was a thief. Once I got lost in the desert, and when I reached a village it was very late, everything was closed. But at last I found one man who was trying to make a hole in t he wall of a house. I asked him where I could stay and he said 'At this time of night it will be difficult, but you can say with me - if you can stay with a thief'.And the man was so beautiful. I stayed for one month! And each night he would say to me, 'Now I am going to my work. You rest, you pray.' When he came back I would ask 'Could you get anything?' He would say, 'Not tonight. But tomorrow I will try again, God willing.' He was never in a state of hopelessness, he was always happy. When I was meditating and meditating for years on end and nothing was happening, many times the moment came when I was so desperate, so hopeless,that I thought to stop all this nonsense. And suddenly I would remember the thief who would say every night, 'God willing, tomorrow it is going to happen.'

And my second master was a dog. I was going to the river, thirsty and a dog came. He was also thirsty. He looked into the river, he saw another dog there -- his own image -- and became afraid. He would bard and run away, but his thirst was so much that he would come back. Finally, despite his fear, he just jumped into the water, and the image disappeared. And I knew that a message had come to me from God: one has to jump in spite of all fears.

And the third master was a small child. I entered a town and a child was carrying a lit candle. he was going to the mosque to put the candle there.'Just joking,' I asked the boy, 'Have you lit the candle yourself?' He said, 'Yes sir.' And I asked, 'There was a moment when the candle was unlit, then there was a moment when the candle was lit. Can you show me the source from which the light came?' And the boy laughed, blew out the candle, and said, 'Now you have seen the light going. Where has it gone? You will tell me!' My ego was shattered, my whole knowledge was shattered. And that moment I felt my own stupidity. Since then I dropped all my knowledgeability.

It is true that I had no master. That does not mean that I was not a disciple -- I accepted the whole existence as my master. My Disciplehood was a greater involvement than yours is. I trusted the clouds, the trees. I trusted existence as such. I had no master because I had millions of masters I learned from every possible source. To be a disciple is a must on the path. What does it mean to be a disciple? It means to be able to learn. to be available to learn to be vulnerable to existence. With a master you start learning to learn.

The master is a swimming pool where you can learn how to swim. Once you have learned, all the oceans are yours."

Interesting Questions

11 Trippy Questions

How many of these can you get? Especially the last 4 are challenging. The are great for bars.

Q1. A murderer is condemned to death. He has to choose between three rooms: The first is full of raging fires, the second is full of assassins with loaded guns, and the third is full of lions that haven't eaten in 3 years. Which room is safest for him?

Q2. A woman shoots her husband. Then she holds him under water for over 5 minutes. Finally, she hangs him. But 5 minutes later they both go out together and enjoy a wonderful dinner together. How can this be?

Q3. A magician was boasting one day at how long he could hold his breath under water. His record was 6 minutes. A kid that was listening said, "that's nothing, I can stay under water for 10 minutes using no type of equipment or air pockets!" The magician told the kid if he could do that, he'd give him $10,000. The kid did it and won the money. Can you figure out how?

Q4. There are two plastic jugs filled with water. How could you put all of this water into a barrel, without using the jugs or any dividers, and still tell which water came from which jug?

Q5. What is black when you buy it, red when you use it, and grey when you throw it away?

Q6. Can you name three consecutive days without using the words Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, or Sunday?

Q7. This is an unusual paragraph. I'm curious how quickly you can find out what is so unusual about it? It looks so plain you would think nothing was wrong with it! In fact, nothing is wrong with it! It is unusual though. Study it, and think about it, but you still may not find anything odd. But if you work at it a bit, you might find out! Try to do so without any coaching!

Q8. You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?

Q9. If you overtake the last person, then you are...?

Q10. (in your head!) Take 1000 and add 40 to it. Now add another 1000. Now add 30. Add another 1000. Now add 20. Now add another 1000. Now add 10. What is the total?

Q11. Mary's father has five daughters: 1. Nana, 2. Nene, 3. Nini, 4. Nono. What is the name of the fifth daughter?

Now how many could you answer?

Scroll down for answers:-

ANSWERS:-

A1. The third. Lions that haven't eaten in three years are dead.

A2. The woman was a photographer. She shot a picture of her husband, developed it, and hung it up to dry.

A3. The kid filled a glass of water and held it over his head for 10 minutes.

A4. Colour and Freeze them first. Take them out of the jugs and put the ice in the barrel. You will be able to tell which water came from which jug.

A5. The answer is Charcoal. In Homer Simpson's words: hmmmm... Barbecue.

A6. Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow.

A7. The letter "e", which is the most common letter in the English language, does not appear once in the long paragraph

A8. If you answer that you are first, then you are absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are second!

A9. If you answered that you are second to last, then you are wrong again. Tell me, how can you overtake the LAST person?!

A10. Did you get 5000? The correct answer is actually 4100. Don't believe it? Check with your calculator!

A11. Nunu? NO! Of course not. The fifth daughter is Mary. Read the question again.

Swadhyay

clipped from www.swadhyay.org he word Swadhyay literally means “study of the self”. Delving deeper, we find that it is actually a life-changing experience.It is a philosophy intended to uplift human life; as Rev. Dadaji says. “We do not want a philosophy which is purely theoretical and which merely discusses utopian ideas and theories. We do not want a philosophy which is merely otherworldly; instead, we want a philosophy which is practical, one that can be useful in our daily lives, i.e. we want a philosophy that can be lived.”